Calling All Writers To Participate

The subject of today’s blog has been pounding at me for weeks. I’ve teetered back and forth on a daily basis as to whether or not I should blog about it. In the end, I decided a blog is to get your opinion out there and invite others to give feedback so their viewpoint can be taken into consideration. I’m not looking to stir up drama, but  I am inviting comments and opinions, which I will post (at my discretion so please no vulgar language)  

The explosion of e-books and self published works has been growing rapidly. Millions of out of print books will be coming to e-book format. Big publishing houses are creating e-book divisions and some are even selling editing and cover art services to authors who choose to self publish. That being said, I’m sure you can agree that the road ahead in e-books looks bright. In other words, it’s here to stay. But, here’s the problem. Anyone with a kindle can download an e-book, just like anyone with a computer can search for porn. It’s up to the parent to monitor their kids right? Right. I’m with you.

Issue:  The sticky situation that has me scratching my head is this: I am a mother of two young children. My motto is, if they ask, I tell them the truth. Sex, drugs, sexual preferences, bullying,  drinking and driving, drinking etc. I believe right now, at their tender ages (9 and 7 and I started years ago.) their brains are like sponges. When a parent waits to talk to their kids about these subjects often times it’s too late. Teenagers know it all right? They often blow you off because the “cool stage” is upon them and you’re nothing but a dork who isn’t up to date with the latest. I have a group of friends that I adore. Mothers who I respect and admire. We often share parenting tips and advice and I am forever grateful for them. These are the women I would leave my children with because I trust them. Some have teenage girls who have read all four Fifty Shades Of Grey books. What? I was outraged. How could they let their daughters read those books at sixteen? The response I often get is, “She knows everything there is to know about sex anyway. You should see what their friends are doing.” Oy! Really!  I can agree that teenagers today are probably, more than ever, experienced beyond their years but that doesn’t make it right does it? I know it’s a personal choice but when I tell them my view, they stop to think about it.

My opinion: The mechanics of a sexual encounter is fine. And most teenagers know the terminology and then some. BUT, it’s the emotional disconnect I worry about. The act of allowing a partner to inflict pain for sexual gratification (when you have no experience in the world of BDSM) can be misleading. It romanticized the act of co-dependency. When we are young, we all want to be the one to “Fix” the man we fall in love with. But, what if he can’t be fixed? Or, what if you’re not the one who can fix him? As we age we learn lessons of the heart that enable us to pass these words of wisdom down to our daughters. Will they listen? And what about the daughters who have mothers that are disconnected (too many these days) The purpose of a romance novel is to deliver the happily ever after life often doesn’t. It’s a book. Its fantasy. And the kicker is….the hero is a woman! Not always, but the majority of romance books are written by women. We create the hero. But when a young girl reads love, she has stars in her eyes. Now, they can say they understand it’s just a book, but when faced with that love, with all its storm and turmoil making their blood rush and their heart beat, good sense falls away. I write these books but each time I create a heroine, I try to stop and think about who could be reading it. I have a letter to my readers on my website and I think all books, self published and traditional should come with a rating system like a movie. Not to say it can be enforced but something a parent can glance at and question. I think I’m rambling and that tends to happen when I’m passionate about my subject.

I would appreciate ane welcome opinions. Am I too sensitive. Should just worry about my own and forget about yours? What do you think?

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2 Responses to “Calling All Writers To Participate”

  1. i wish i had an answer. i have two teenage boys and they share time between my ex’s house and mine. i do the best i can to keep an eye on things, but i cannot watch them all of the time. my ex and i do not communicate, so i can only hope that he keeps a watchful eye on them. i have always kept the lines of communication open and hope that they use good judgement and if they do something stupid – they are kids after all and we, as parents/grown ups are not immune from ‘stupid’, i just hope we will be there for each other and can work it out – and if that means undesirable consequences, so be it. like i said, i have no answer.

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    • Thank you for your reply. I have a sister who has a similiar situation and while it is never easy, she bares the brunt of raising her children. You are right, there is no answer except to be the best parent you can be. Life is unpredictable and not every child rises to the occasion. Even the ones we “think” have it togeher.

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